Single Ladies, Be Content And Enjoy!

Seven, eight years ago when I was working in Alor Gajah, I hung out swimming or shopping with a colleague who was also my age. She was dating a married man who couldn't promise her any future. She saw her younger sisters and some of her other lady friends having a boyfriend then getting married one by one. She told me that she sometimes drove half an hour to the beach alone just to cry when she felt miserable being single. Later the relationship ended. After she got a new car which consumed more petrol, she hardly went to beach. When she was down again, she would cry in her room instead, thinking of herself pitiful because she had no husband.

I was quite surprised by her self-pity. Being a single also then, I used to enjoy my life with books and friends. Later when I moved to my own house, I felt very good staying at home alone after work and enjoyed receiving guests on weekends. Two years ago, I was very much involved in helping out in a care home that I was hardly at home and I enjoyed the friendship of the children as well as other co-workers. I was serving out of a cheerful heart, not loneliness.

I often said to my other single girl friends or those who were concerned about my marital status, "I'm very happy being a single person. If I'm married, I'll be very happy in a different way, not happier. I don't need to envy those who are married." 

After I read the booklet "Singleness" by RBC Ministries,

I understood I was content because I totally accepted my singleness.

I especially like this--

The biblical teaching about singleness can be summarized by the following statements:

1. We need one another. We need companionship and relationships--whether single or married.

2. God accepts and respects singleness. Nothing in the Bible indicates that a person who chooses not to marry has any less worth than a person who marries.

3. Singleness has advantage for the person who wants to give his or her life to God's service.

4. God gives wonderful gifts. One of them is the ability and choice to be single for many years or for a lifetime.

5. God is all-sufficient. His sufficiency sustains the adult single. It's okay to want to be married, but it's far more important, single or married, to lean on the sufficiency of Christ and walk in obedience to Him.

This year before I got married, I had an afternoon tea with that colleague whom I hadn't met for quite some time. She was still single and busied herself with work. I shared with her my love testimony and encouraged her to continue to hope for a life partner while fully enjoying her singleness. Her eyes shone as she listened to me.

Now that I've officially said bye-bye to my singleness, I'm still a very happy person, in a different way.