Women, Friends And Tears

These few months, three ladies opened their hearts to me.

The first person had bitterness towards her in-law family, which indirectly led to her husband's having affair with another woman who lent him her ears. She wept and said to me, "I never thought that one day I myself would become a main actress in this kind of drama. Lee Sah, after you told me that the most precious thing he found in me before our marriage was the fact that I got along with his family very well. I've been trying to make effort to treat them like I used to. But it's too late..."

When I held her arm, my tears also dropped.

She is temporarily separated from her husband to calm down. I could not offer my house as her three-month shelter. Nevertheless, I welcome her as a guest to drop by anytime to chat, even late at night, or have a meal with me.

Since this incident, she realised that close friends are very important because there are things she cannot tell her original family who live in other states, even though she keeps in touch with them on the phone every day.

The second friend has been experiencing difficulties dealing with her lady boss who has a very different personality. A few weeks ago, she told me that she was very busy. In order not to disturb her, I seldom telephoned her, let alone visited her. Last Thursday morning, when I was driving to work, I received a call from her with a sobbing voice. "Lee Sah, please pray for me. Actually I've been restraining myself from revealing to you my working stress and anxious thoughts, but I can't take it anymore. I don't feel like going to work. I remember you told me that even if the people in whole Melaka ignored me, you would still care for me..."

After she hung up, I also moved to tears in my car and started praying that the Lord had mercy on her who had been going through so much hardship for years. I went to her place that afternoon and spent one hour eating her oyster chicken rice with her family, telling them about my recent social life, then my turn listening to her and hitting her shoulder softly when we were alone in her room. She looked quite cheerful after crying to God and to me. Since I had known her, I learned to give physical comfort to friends of the same gender.

The third lady was someone I had only met two times. I was told that she had been working as a shopkeeper in a bookstore but I did not step into that shop for a long time. Two weeks ago, I thought of going there to survey bibles and sermon CDs. As there were nobody else besides us, we began our casual conversation. She was facing more and more unfavorable situations with her husband who had transferred his feeling to another woman as a result of their past long geographical separation. Being a foreigner in this land, she had limited moral and financial support.

As she poured her heart out, she took tissue paper to wipe her wet eyes and nose. All I could do was to say encouraging words, offer some simple help and remind her that God has His timing for everything. She invited me to go for lunch with her but as customers entered on and off, I preferred to join her one week later. Last Friday when I saw her again, she told me that she felt better after talking to me.

In the latest MLM class, Ps Richard said that the most underutilized resource in the Kingdom of God is the men, most of whom are still in a lying position. Maybe when the men finally get up, the women will no longer need to shed so many tears in front of their friends.