The Road To Reality

Last May when I went to "Bible Gateway", I noticed that the website was giving out free copies of K.P. Yohannan's "Revolution In World Missions". I had never heard of the book nor the author, but I was interested in knowing more about missions after reading Brother Andrew's "God Smuggler" early this year.

As Malaysia was not in the list of the countries where the book could be delivered to, I requested Emi to sign up on my behalf, hoping to get it when I was in Japan in June. During my stay, the book still did not arrive. Several weeks after I came back, Ah Yu posted it to Batu Pahat from Japan. I spent two days to devour the whole book, putting aside others that I had bought earlier but had not even browsed through a single page. This founder of Gospel For Asia, a ministry that trains and supports native missionaries, inspired me a lot with his obedience to the Lord and his compassion for the lost souls in the remote areas in Asia where the Gospel was not yet preached.

During my outing to Mahkota Parade several weeks ago, I walked into Thai Kuang bookstore. There were two long rows of new and used books for clearance. My eyes were sharp enough to notice the names of a few Christian authors. K.P. Yohannan's was one of them. This was his second book published in the USA where he had been a popular speaker at missions conferences to raise awareness about God's unchanged calling to Christians to spread the good news of salvation to the ends of the earth.

Here’s an excerpt from the Chapter 6:
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The Lost Message of the Cross

But something is still very wrong.

Why are so few living out of the "not I but Christ" life-style that Paul describes in Galatians 2:20? Although God eagerly desires to manifest Himself within us, I believe it is because so few of us have learned to let the cross do its deadly work in our flesh on a daily basis. We haven't yet come to a full understanding of the cross.

We must return to Calvary. The glory and presence of Christ will return to our lives and churches only when we have rediscovered the cross of Christ.

The cross has two operations. First, on it Christ paid the penalty for our sins and thus bought our eternal salvation. But it doesn't stop there. The second work of the cross provides for our ongoing sanctification -- the daily, continuous crucifixion of our flesh. This great doctrine is not very popular lately because it requires a voluntary acceptance of death to ego or self.

Someone has put it this way, "If self is on the throne, then Christ is on the cross. If Christ is on the throne, then self is on the cross."

This is why Paul says in 2 Corinthians 4:10 that we are "always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body." Accepting death to my ego is the only way to manifest the life of Christ. Putting my "self" to death is the only way to exchange my life for His.

I believe that this is the real meaning of Galatians 2:20 where Paul says, "I'm crucified with Christ."

So here is the spiritual law of the flesh: The measure to which I will manifest the life of Christ is the same measure to which I am willing to put my "self" to death.

When Jesus walked on earth, God was showing us not only what He was like but also what He wanted man to be like. Jesus had authority and power because He constantly submitted Himself to the will of the Father in every matter. Christ pleased the Father and reflected the Father perfectly because He perfectly put to death His flesh. And we repeat this cycle as we submit to our head, the Lord Jesus.

This is the life that is connected to Jesus, the head, on a decision-by-decision basis. It is the submitted, dead-to-self life that the Lord can animate and used for His glory. It is the only kind of life He will empower and use.

If we're rightly connected to the head in this way, it would be hard to imagine making any decision without first submitting it to Christ for His approval. What would that do to the way we spend our time? What does Christ say about TV and the films we view, the music we listen to, or the catalogs and magazines we read?

What about our activities -- church, clubs, leisure time, friendships, hobbies, prayer, service, sports and study?

What about our relationships with boyfriends, girlfriends, mentors and role models? Whom do we idolize and pattern our lives after?

What about our purchases, both the large and small ones? Is our shopping basket under His control? Does He direct the checks we write? What about the "big buys" -- our car, home and insurance?

And of course, there are those major decisions in life -- full-time missionary service, career and job plans, education and the choice of a mate.

For the Christian, none of these things is any longer a personal decision. It is not what others say, what self says or what circumstances dictate. The only valid question is always, What does Christ say to me about this decision?

But most of us find ourselves making even the big decisions without prayer and waiting for guidance from the Holy Spirit.

Obviously, the gap between this kind of biblical Christianity and the shallow spirituality of our day is a significant one. How different is this kind of self-sacrificing faith from the pleasure-seeking, self-serving, wimpy religion so often preached and practised in our churches!
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This message is not only for the western countries. If you are a Christian like me who is so blessed with material comfort, I strongly recommend this book to you.

Real Love Ministry's Thanksgiving Fundraising Dinner

Early this year, Pastor Edmund Smith was invited to a Sunday service at Calvary Life Assembly (CLA) to give a short presentation of his Real Love Ministry (RLM). I was very impressed by his frankness with his status of an ex-homosexual.

Later, Jagan showed me a local news article on Ps Edmond, his family and his ministry. I was further touched by his courage to reveal his identity to the public and share his early struggles. Two months ago, Sis Christine approached me with tickets of Thanksgiving Fundraising Dinner (TFD) organized by RLM which she was helping to sell. After the Lisbon Chamber Choir, I had learned to support Christian ministries. So this time I did not hesitate too long to get myself a seat.

From the ticket, I got to know their website. Ps Edmund Smith's own testimony led me to understand why he has a heart for the ex-homosexual, the deaf and the street people. Since, I became a regular follower of their blog. I would love to attend their sign language class on Monday evenings but I already had a commitment with Agape care centre (ACC).

A few weeks before the TFD, SH telephoned me to invite me to the same TFD under ACC as their chairlady Caroline had sponsored a table to bless those who were involved in the single mothers' support group. Now I had two seats. SR who was interested in the dinner had not given me any reply. VC told me he would not be around. As the programme would be conducted in English and sign language, Mum would not be keen. One week after I talked to PG who was willing to travel from Batu Pahat to Melaka to attend this dinner, he was sorry to turn down my offer because of an anniversary.

People around me seemed to be busy with other charity events or their own activities. During the last Sunday service at CLA before the TFD, sis Christine, knowing that I had an extra ticket, asked me if I would like to bless a church member. Without hesitation, I let go the ticket.

On Friday evening, I received a call from Albert P.

"This Saturday, you're invited to join us for Ps Edmund Smith's dinner. Ps James has bought two tables. Previous years, the staff would attend but this year, they have decided to let the Calvary care home (CCH) boys, staff and volunteers to go."

"I already knew about this dinner and I'm going. But you'll have to cut me into two pieces."

He was puzzled. So I started to explain my situation briefly.

"But I think it would be nice if you could sit with the care home children."

Since I was a Calvarite and I started to serve CCH earlier than ACC, I thought it was quite reasonable to "immigrate" back.

"OK then, I'm transfered to your table. I'll inform my friend from Agape. If there is any problem, I'll call you back."

I knew SH was still having a headache in contacting people to arrange seats and transports, especially after ACC was given more sponsored tables. The latest change was that VC would be in Melaka on 31 Oct and he agreed to go for the TFD. So he would represent me to sit at ACC table while I would be at CCH table. I planned to travel often between the two tables to chat with people during the dinner if necessary. Moreover, I would be still fetching a few persons from ACC as promised. The problems had been solved even before they existed!

Last Saturday early evening, when I reached Ping Ming School with my passengers, Ps Edmund Smith and his team members were welcoming us at the reception on the second floor.

Other ministries for the marginalized communities and community services in Melaka were having an exhibition and selling items to raise fund.

Ps James' daughter Cathy was also in charge of one of the booths. SH's two little angles Nathaniel and Nadine who came with my car were running everywhere among the crowd. I had to keep an eye on them

while waiting for SH who arrived later with her eldest son Johanan and others who needed a lift from her. Aunty Gek had been on duty for ACC booth since 5pm.

I was given the tickets of two tables to pass to the ACC diners.

But I could not enter the dining hall myself since I was no longer with ACC, but CCH. Albert P was the one holding my ticket. As VC was about to go in first, he noticed the care home boys were already seated near the entrance with their "principal".

I immediately waved at Albert P from outside who passed my ticket to me. Before the dinner started, I had talked half an hour with my friends of all ages from CCH and ACC. It was not a surprise to see some Calvarites and my MLM classmates there to support this annual event.

About seventy tables were almost occupied when the first dish of the seven-course dinner was served.

I was sitting with other CCH staff and volunteers next to the boys' table. When we could not finish a dish, I would pass the plate to the boys who helped to clear it within little time.

While we were savouring the Chinese halal food, we were also enjoying the performances and listening to testimonies from RLM members on the stage. A sign language translator would always make sure that the deaf diners at the reserved front tables knew what was going on and understood the message.

The special guest was our local artist Francisca Peter who presented praise and secular songs in English, Malay and Mandarin.

The TFD was also a time to appreciate the RLM key servants whose lives had been transformed by our loving Saviour Jesus Christ and whose turn it was to bring other lost souls to know our Lord.

As the dinner lasted much longer than scheduled, many guests did not wait until the blessed draw. Albert P had to bring the boys back to the home early, so he left all their tokens with me. God blessed CCH with two quantum necklaces at around RM500 each, sponsored by a company which gave away its profit to help the poor. When I walked on the stage to receive one of the prizes on behalf of CCH, I was excited as if I had won the prize.

Are you looking for real love? Now you know where to find it.

Two Gatherings With Students

Last Monday before I dismissed my first class, a student suggested that we went for a drink at "Jonker Walk Cafe". As I had never been to this cafe, I thought it might be very far since its name sounded like it was located at the tourist area.

When I followed my students out of the city campus building, I realized the cafe was just opposite it at the corner of the Hang Tuah mall. Later, I was told that they had chosen this one because it was not crowded like other more popular cafes at Hang Tuah road. No wonder a worker was standing outside full time to attract the staff and students from our establishment with a discount of 10 percent...

In class, the boys were always noisier than the girls. But in the cafe, they were quite reserved. Not only they talk little, they also ordered little.

The girls, once in an eatery, would immediately forget about the diet. Almost all of them took a dish with a drink each.

Many of them had not even had time to take their breakfast before the 10.30am class. It was unthinkable for me who had never missed my breakfast every day at 7am when I was a student, whether I had an assignment to submit or a test to sit for.

Although we were not chewing the baguette in the classroom like the other group, I enjoyed this gathering nonetheless.

On Thursday, it was the final French class with my second batch of TESL students. After one and a half year, I finally succeeded in moving them to organize a meal. When I arrived at the classroom, only a few boys were there. So I assumed the girls were on the way to fetch dishes prepared by themselves based on French recipes but was told that they had actually asked outsiders to cater the food. I began to realize that not all girls were as passionate in cooking as my former student of the previous batch of the TESL students to the point of sacrificing her sleep.

I was giving back test papers when others came with containers. The room was filled with the nice smell of spaghetti tomato sauce. There were also French fries, mushroom soup, drinks etc.

The most mouth-watering dish was no doubt these hotdogs envelopped by melted cheese.

I had bought buns earlier and left in the fridge in my house, which hardened very fast and did not soften much in the cold air conditioned building. Haizam who had brought his own big bowl as if to eat ramen was the first to take a bun dipped in the lukewarm mushroom soup. After ten minutes, he was still having a "hard" time to munch it! All of us were seated around the tables joined together, savouring the food and watching their role plays in French saved in CD and projected on the big screen.

At the end of the gathering, two boxes of ice-cream were brought in for our desserts. I wished the buns were as soft as that melted ice-cream which tasted like mousse.

Towards the end of the semester, I appreciated these students more than the beginning. I thanked them for their attendance, punctuality and active participation. They were among those who made my days at city campus.

My Brother Built A Free Wall For Me

When Dad was around, he came to this house at Paya Rumput four times. He was satisfied with everything except for one: the wet kitchen wall which I was sharing with my neighbours who had not yet moved in. He thought the wall was low and that it was easy for a perpetrator to suddenly jump over it to harm me while I was near the stove. I knew he was very concerned about my safety but I personally did not consider it a potential danger. So I never bothered to find a contractor to do the extension.

Three years after Dad passed away, the next-door house which was attached to mine was finally occupied by an Indian family. For weeks, their conversations in Tamil or English reached my ears clearly when I was at the kitchen, even the dining room. When my English or Malay speaking visitors were around, we had to lower our voices. I started to feel the inconvenience that noise was invading my house through this kitchen wall.

One day when I came back, I suddenly noticed this wall was extended double in height with bricks but the floor was dirty with traces of cement. Having had experience with my back Malay neighbours who had also not informed me of anything before they started the extension work of their wet kitchen, I had learned to be tolerant. I did not plan to make any complaints to these Indian neighbours. I just wanted to let them know that I preferred to have their workers coming over to paint my side of the wall when somebody was around. As I was out to work during the week, VC was the best candidate to deal with the male workers.

A few days later, the wall was covered with cement. VC told me that an Indonesian worker, who was under a Christian contractor, had recognized his Sarawakian accent and asked him which church he was attending. When VC mentioned Calvary Life Assembly, he was surprised to learn that the Indonesian worker also used to be in the BM congregation when the church was located at Bukit Baru. Not only this brother in Christ knew Ps Albert, he was also familiar with other Calvarites of the BM service. What a small world!

The wall still needed to be painted but VC was no longer available. So I had to approach the workers by myself one day after I came back from work. The Indonesian man was the one who responded to me. The fear to let a male "stranger" enter my house was gone as I knew he was my brother in Christ. And it was nice to talk about the church members we both knew.

When I passed some kurma (dates) and bottled water to all the workers next door, the brother thanked me with a grin. I started to thank God for sending me to the BM service, so that I had opportunities to befriend more people easily.

If Dad saw this two-time higher wall now, he would also smile broadly.

Flood At Taman Paya Rumput Indah

Yesterday at dusk, I had a rare chance to take a short stroll nearby after these two busy months. I was surprised to find out there was some drainage work going on for the road behind my house. Cars had to be parked at the roadside instead of the porch because the tiles of the entrance were temporarily broken to give way to the digging. As I was curious, I approached a lady standing outside her house to find out what was happening. She told me that the drain were being deepened after their kitchens were attacked by the flow of water due to recent downpour.

Lastly, she said, "We had never imagined that this taman could be flooded!"

I also have never thought of associating this disaster with Taman Paya Rumput Indah because the whole residential area was situated at such a high ground level. I used to tell others that if it were flooded, whole Melaka would be under water. Yet, the flood had truly happened to my neighbours living so close to me. Ironically, their houses were also facing another big drain.

I remembered six years ago when I was at the sales office, the estate agent told me that many buyers had brought their fengshui masters to the empty land to help choosing their future houses. And those who did not want to face neighbours opposite them had to pay RM7,000 to get the view of the field. I only trusted God to lead me to an ideal house according to His will. The only opinion I asked from the agent was the position of the sun to make sure that my living room would be filled with the morning sunlight, not the afternoon one. And I simply picked one based on the map as if I were playing Monopoly.

After I moved into this house and I looked at other houses of the same type, I realized the location of mine was the best. Even today, I still think the same. As it is not on the main road, few cars pass by. It is not a dead-end road unlike the other one on the other side of the field. It is not a long road either, so I could join the main road very fast. Not only my road is higher than those behind, my house is also exceptionally higher than many other houses on the same road. From my house, I can still see the field but it is not too near. Therefore, noise of people having outdoor activities there do not reach me.

Mum sometimes thinks that I should have taken one of the houses on the road behind, as there were a lot of Chinese residents. But I am actually very grateful that God has placed me to be surrounded by Malay, Indian and Baba Nyonya neighbours who neither keep dogs, sing karaoke loudly, nor burn papers which fly over to my front yard.

And there is one more fact to convince her: no flood.

An Interesting Tuesday Afternoon At Calvary Care Home

Last month, Albert P, who had taken over the leadership of Calvary care home as a volunteer, asked me if I could spend fixed time with the boys so that they would not idle in the afternoons. As I was already visiting the boys on Tuesdays when I was free, so his request was just nice to let me commit myself to be there on a more regular basis.

It was one week left before the final exams for some of them. I felt a bit sorry when I reached there twenty minutes late with a big vanilla custard loaf for the boys' snack, thinking that those who were serious with their studies would be already in front of their books. Actually all were having a meeting with Albert P right in front of the house. John had gone back to be with his biological family after his PMR examinations. When the discussion about the management of their pocket money was settled, Albert P sent the younger ones into the study room while the elder ones stayed to continue their conversation with Albert P.

Wilson took the bread to the kitchen to cut it into slices and served everyone. In this home, the spirit of sharing was strongly present.

The boys arranged their own desks and chairs, and started doing their own activities: drawing or doing homework. Since it was towards the end of the school year, those who had sat for UPSR examinations some time ago were already in the holiday mood. I was standing next to David when he suddenly asked me to look at the ceiling on the right. At first I refused, thinking that they wanted to play a trick on me. As they kept urging me, I raised my head. Another boy shouted "A snake!". The moment I noticed its shadow, the boys were rushing out to see the reptile. So I quickly followed them.

When I was also running past Albert P and the elder boys with my camera, I said, "It looks like I'm joining them more than they're joining me!" Albert P laughed. Mark was tackling the tiny snake with a stick. Wilson also gave a hand. The rest were watching.

They did not take a long time to pull the snake down to the floor. Compared to the one I had seen last year, this one was much thinner.

There was a little blood on the snake's head. To make sure it would not survive, Paul sprayed pesticide and lit a fire with a lighter to burn it at the same time. The poor thing was motionless after these numerous attacks.

God assures us that man has dominion over every creeping thing that creeps on earth (Genesis 1:26). So I did not grieve for this lifeless fellow who had a body, a soul, but no spirit.

The boys approached me, holding the dead snake's tail with fallen leaves with the intention of frightening me. I fled towards Albert, whom I liked to call "Principal" since he was the head of the care home. He commanded the boys to stop bullying me and go back to the study room.

Mark and Luke went back to their seats to continue drawing. I asked Daniel to take out his mathematics exercise book. Before he could settle down, Paul, Matthew, David and Luke came to him.

When I had arrived at the home, I had noticed Daniel's face looked a bit different than usual but I did not pay attention to him. When I took a glance of him again, I realized his both eyebrows were missing! Albert told me what had happened: The previous day, Daniel began to shave his own eyebrows a bit by himself out of fun. The naughty Paul helped to cut more hair above Daniel's eyelids. When Albert saw the boys' nonsense, he did a radical job to remove totally the eyebrows of this youngest child of the home to teach him a lesson.

When I was in the secondary school, my friends used to spread the saying that those who were without eyebrows would see ghosts! I never believed that. I thank God for giving me bushy eyebrows that I did not have to spend time using any cosmetic product to make them darker. Thus, I did not have an eyebrow pencil in my bag to lend to Daniel. Now thanks to Luke's black drawing pen and Paul's artistic talent, Daniel had a pair of artificial eyebrows! When the boys dragged him out in front of Albert, all of us burst into laughter and gave compliments to his new look.

Now Daniel was finally able to solve his mathematics problems one after another without disturbance. Mark still focused on his drawing. Luke joined three other boys to play the aeroplane chess on the floor at the back.

When it was almost 6pm, the elder boys were still chatting with Albert P and William

while the younger boys had left the study room and started to play outdoors. David

and Mark were very excited to show me their fish.

If we had left the snake alone, it might be a great threat to all these creatures in the water.

When I was leaving with my car, the boys took the corpse of the snake from the lawn and put on the wide screen to scare me again. Albert P who was also going off asked them to throw it into the dustbin. He was suffering from a cough and was still willing to spend time having conversations with the boys. And he told me, "Basically, these boys just want to talk to someone." How blessed are we to be their listeners and care takers.

And I thank God that I only remembered those boys' smiling faces when I went to bed that night, not the reptile.

Death Is Swallowed Up In Victory

Yesterday, I was reading "Our Daily Bread" posts of the past four days and came across the one for Friday 16 Octobre, the day I went back to Batu Pahat after one month's absence. Since access to Facebook was blocked by both campuses during the working hours, I did not sign in to the website for weeks.

After I reached home, I surfed Internet and went to the website of this popular social network again. Ping's most recent message was something like this: "I was very down, so I came here to release my feeling. But I was shocked to learn that my good friend's boyfriend had been killed. Who is more sorrowful than she now?" Among her good friends, many were married. I had little idea of whom it could be.

Ping was also back from Johor Bahru a few hours later and told us about the incident which had just taken place earlier on the same day. Her friend SL's boyfriend was surfing Internet alone at a 24-hour fast food restaurant in Petaling Jaya at 4.30am when his laptop was snatched by a man. As SL's boyfriend was chasing after the man, the snatch thief's accomplice suddenly appeared and stabbed him in the waist three times. Both perpetrators managed to escape with their car. The victim was so seriously wounded that he died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.

According to Ping, SL had been together with her boyfriend, who was a Christian, for seven, eight years. She attended the church service regularly and thought of getting baptized after their marriage planned for next year. A snatch theft shattered their dream to buy a house and start a family together.

I did not know SL well, nor had I ever met her boyfriend. So I did not follow Ping to the wake service in Grace Presbyterian church that night. The next afternoon I wanted to go with Ping, but the trip was cancelled because SL was not around. I thought of Teo Beng Hock's wife who must be still mourning for her late future husband's sudden death. I was somehow glad that SL was surrounded by Christians who could comfort her with God's word.

The author of that post of "Our Daily Bread" seemed to predict the physical death of SL's boyfriend. Ping said that SL's boyfriend had been a very kind person. The news report also mentioned that he always offered help to others, even strangers in need. His kind acts were the best testimonies of God's love. I imagined at his memorial service if all those who had been blessed by him were gathered to pay tribute to this follower of Jesus, there would be so much praise to our Lord.

Now what I can do for SL is to hold her in my prayer and hope that she continues to grow spiritually in the midst of her suffering. The Bible says that the body "is sown in weakness, it is raised in power. It is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body... However, the spiritual is not first, but the natural, and afterward the spiritual... Flesh and blood cannot inherit the kingdom of God; nor does corruption inherit incorruption. We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, and the dead will be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed... The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ... Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord." (1 Corinthians 15:56-58 NKJV)

Whether we die in an old, young, sick or wounded body, God has promised to give us a glorious body one day. Death is swallowed up in victory for those who have faith.